Homestuck Re-read Part 67: .
I am not doing super great today. I managed to fail to toast an english muffin properly and then failed to not burn a sausage patty so I'm not feeling especially proud of myself at the moment. I do not understand what I am doing wrong in the slightest. I woke up feeling like I fell down all the stairs and like I was just, generically battered. Whatever. I'll be fine I just, need to keep getting through it.
There is 96 pages of Homestuck in today's upd8.
HOMESTUCK.
We start out back with Calliope and Jade, standing on the stage that appeared in her black hole. It's been decorated to look like the island Jade lived on. They talk about the differences in their childhoods, how Cali has never seen a tree or any plant and their shared love of raw meats. Calliope explains a little bit about her nature as a cherub to Jade, but still doesn't want to get into it. But seeing a discarded cherub tooth and hearing Calli's voice is beginning to make Jade remember. A god tiered Calliope appeared to her in a dream once. The muse told stories to her, lots and lots of stories. One was the story of John's death.
F1X TH1S
We cut back to Terezi, John and Roxy. There is a momentary dispute over Terezi wearing Jade's shoes resulting in John learning that 3V3RYBODY'S D34D. But they don't have to be.
TEREZI: 1 D1D NOT COM3 H3R3 TO B4TH3 1N TH3 R3PUGN4NT 4TT1TUD3 OF 4 D3F34T1ST DORK
TEREZI: 1 C4M3 H3R3 TO FORC3 S41D DORK TO US3 H1S 1NCR3D1BL3 4ND TOT4LLY UNPR3C3D3NT3D POW3RS TO S3T 3V3RYTH1NG R1GHT, 3V3N 1F 1T M34NS ST4BB1NG H1M UNT1L H3 COMPL13S
Roxy interjects into the following argument about how John can't control his powers.
ROXY: have you ever seen your denizen?
...
JOHN: i was tricked into going to see him early.
JOHN: i wasn't ready to see him yet.
JOHN: i would have died if i did.
...
ROXY: if nows not the right time
ROXY: then when even would be
Terezi orders him to do so, he will accept whatever price Typheus demands in exchange for knowledge of how to use his powers. John refuses to unless Roxy also sees her Denizen, in an attempt to try and preserve herself from unexistence. Terezi orders her to do so as well. John and Roxy start acting awkwardly together so Terezi continues to shout at them.
TEREZI: J3GUS, SOM3ON3 FLOG M3 W1TH 4NOTH3R SH1TTY CLOWN, 1 C4N'T T4K3 ON3 MOR3 M1NUT3 W1TH YOU 4DOR4BL3 DW33BS
TEREZI: YOU C4UGHT M3 4T TH3 B444D T1M3, 3GB3RT 4ND L4LOND3. 4NY OTH3R D4Y 1 WOULD B3 T34S1NG YOU 4BOUT TH1S 1N 4 PL4YFUL 4TT3MPT TO M4K3 YOU BOTH UNCOMFORT4BL3, WH1L3 G1GGL1NG M4N14C4LLY
TEREZI: BUT LOOK 4T M3
TEREZI: 1 S41D LOOK 4T M3
TEREZI: DO3S TH1S STR1K3 YOU 4S 4 F4C3 WH1CH 1S PR3P4R3D TO G1GGL3 M4N14C4LLY???
Before John leaves Terezi stops him to discuss part 2 of the plan: How to F1X TH1S if he can learn to control his retcon power. She instructs him to focus on a phrase, one he'll be able to remember.
> JOHN: there's no place like home.
She, seemingly, fails to do the mind-y thing. She tells him to leave. There's nothing left for Terezi to do, she's the last troll standing and she's suffered a mortal wound. Soon, she will bleed out on in the deserts of LOPAN.
A STORY
Calliope and Jade are working on recording the story the muse told Jade. It begins as Jade's story, with a tragedy on LOWAS. We then hear a very odd detail
JADE: but yes, the tragedy is why i was alone on the golden ship
JADE: it was not long after our three year journey began
This is not the Jade we expected. I think the first time I read homestuck, I didn't quite catch that. At least not right then.
Aboard the prospitian battleship, Jade had shrunk John and Davesprite so they could visit lowas. After a few moments however. The planet exploded. John remained dead. Jade is unable to imagine how a sudden and unexpected death could either be heroic or just. The next three years were in solitude, apart from the carapacians and the consorts. Towards the end of the trip, when she was close to completely despondent, she had a dream. This is where she met the muse. The two loneliest souls in paradox space were in each other's company. The muse knew of John's death, and at one point recounted the tale to Jade, pinning the blame for LOWAS' destruction and John's death on the sudden awakening of Typheus. She called it a 'correction.'
The dreams of all versions of sleeping denizens bubble up from the same pool, the infinite spring of creativity that powers Skaia connects them across paradox space. Somewhere else a version of John had made a bargain with Typheus that required sacrifice and out of desperation he took it.
The pair stop for a moment to discuss. This version of Calliope couldn't relate to human emotion, and Calliope ponders if this version did not know the alpha kids. Was her 'humanization' the cause of her being unable to predominate over Caliborn? Things get a bit meta before proceeding. There's an intermission in the story, where Jade names a bunch of consorts! But it's quickly resumed.
The story seems to be of Alpha John. How he returned to his planet and travelled to the place where constellations danced beneath the clouds and freed the stars from the shade to release them into heaven. He needed to play a song to summon the breeze, but the pipes were clogged with oil. John was not there to play the wind however, he sought help with powers he could not control. They giggle about drawing a big green snake.
We see the drawing transition into the reality John saw. Tphus issued him an offer he couldn't refuse. The valves to the chamber were opened, and oil flooded the room. Sink or swim John, either learn to master the power and escape, or drown in tar. Neither would help him, death for obvious reasons and escape as it did not progress his quest, he would be unable to play the song. Realizing a third option granted him some mastery over his powers: remove the oil.
Every drop on LOWAS was splattered across the narrative. Part replacement, part signature. He had freed LOWAS from the pollutant. The pipes were clear, John could play the breeze. The wind blew across the planet, freeing the fireflies and blowing away the stardust corruption caused by Caliborn's interference.
The upd8 ends as the cartridge is blown clean out of the slot. Thank you for reading.